Sunday,February 8, 2026
Hello! 🙋♂️✨ It's 1:30 PM on Sunday. This is massangoto! 🧑💻
Regarding my X account (which I recently resumed), my weekly follower count has reached 5,730. Thank you so much to all my followers! I am truly happy!
Anyway, it is freezing! 🥶 It’s been snowing, and apparently, it came down hard last night. There is about 3-4cm of snow piled up on bicycles and stairs, and it’s still falling. I couldn't make it to the supermarket, but I managed with what I had: natto, green onions, and spinach for breakfast. For lunch, I added fried eggs and rice. So, I think I’ll only need to pop out to buy some drinks today. My money-saving plan is a success!
Valentine's Day is coming up soon. I actually received chocolates from my ex-girlfriend, so I sent her a thank-you message on LINE. Interestingly, my "auditory hallucinations" (the voices) rarely thanked me, saying, "We have received the offering! We will protect you!" The only other person I might get chocolate from is my mom (lol). But since my diet is going well, I need to be careful not to let my guard down and rebound. A little self-control is necessary here.
Thanks to increasing my Rivotril to 1.5mg, the "shocks" happen much less frequently now. Even if they come, they aren't big. However, I often feel physically unwell, so—I wouldn't call it "sleeping to escape," but I've been going to bed around 4:00 PM.
I have a psychiatrist appointment next week, so I plan to listen to music with earphones and take the train or bus as usual. Recently, I almost had a bike accident by a margin of about 20cm. 🚲💦 Because of that, I decided to use public transport for everything except going to the supermarket. That said, since I'm a semi-shut-in, I only really go out for hospital visits. Bicycle regulations are getting stricter starting in April, so I’m thinking of retiring from cycling around then and switching to walking. I used to ride my bike while blasting music in my earphones back in the day, but there must have been too many accidents. The penalties have finally become strict.
An interesting phenomenon occurred recently. My auditory hallucinations, which can speak at a human level, actually reminded me at lunchtime: "You forgot your lunch meds and PRN meds!" It’s funny that the hallucination urged me to take the very medication that suppresses it. Just hearing voices confirms the illness, but it's amusing that they are helping with medication compliance. 😂
On an unrelated note, while I was being quiet and just using LINE, a male neighbor in the house on the other side shouted, "Shut up!" Looking back, an old neighbor upstairs used to complain, "You're too loud, I can't sleep!" and moved out. A neighbor who passed away recently also used to shout, "Shut up! You got a problem?!" and his voice is even recorded in my videos. When things like this continue, I start to feel paranoid, wondering if my inner voice is being broadcast to all of humanity. inside my head, the voices endlessly sing parodies of songs I just heard (like at the supermarket), which is quite noisy. If others can hear that, it must be annoying. Of course, it’s also possible that the shouting itself was a hallucination.
Schizophrenia isn't a rare disease, so it's better to prevent it by managing stress well and venting it out. Once you develop it, you end up losing about 10 years of your life.
It is very cold due to the snow and cold wave, so please stay warm and don't catch a cold.
That's it for the blog! See you next Sunday! Wishing you no accidents, no violations, family safety, and prosperity in business today.
This was massangoto! 🙋✨️
Discover Gotō's memoir, 'A Half-Life with Schizophrenia', now on Kindle. 📖
